Q & A with Georgina Rose, MD

Georgina Rose [her pen name], a Manhattan internist, like many pretty, accomplished, charming professional women across the country (and the world), is looking for the right man. After several years of dating “players,” getting fed up, and undergoing psychoanalysis that she says helped her to “change [her] pattern” with men, she decided to write and self-publish a book about her experience. Her book, “Are You Ready for The One: A Career Woman’s Guide to Finding Your Man” purports to help women better understand their unconscious minds and build their confidence: two things Rose says she’s done. Now that she’s attracting nicer men, Rose, 34, who hails originally from Geneva, Switzerland, spoke with Blueprint about how she meets men, why women overanalyze, and why she thinks so many of the most accomplished and attractive women are still single.

Blueprint: Georgina, in your book, “Are You Ready for the One?” you write that you needed to “break [your] pattern” with men, and you seem to employ a psychoanalytic approach. Can you share any specifics about what your “pattern” was?

Georgina Rose: I was idealizing a lot of the men I was dating, putting them on a pedestal and not respecting myself enough. Just like I looked up to my father, not seeing any of his faults … My pattern also consisted of focusing on external aspects of the guys themselves, their physical appearance and social status instead of working on establishing a lasting, loving relationship.

Blueprint: You call your book “A Career Woman”s Guide to Finding the One” and encourage women to build our confidence by giving ourselves “credit for personal achievements.” But I know quite a few genuinely beautiful, successful, confident career women in their 30”s and above – especially in New York and Los Angeles – who have not found the right man. What gives?

It’s true that the quantity of single, beautiful, successful women in big cities like Manhattan is quite astonishing … So many of the women who are actually married aren’t as good looking or as career driven. I believe there are maybe two reasons for this. First, someone who’s achieved a lot career wise and is beautiful will likely have greater expectations and be more demanding of the guys she meets. And second, guys are intimidated by high powered women. They do need to feel like they are the providers. So it is a tricky situation. The best advice I can give is, keep work at work, and let your feminine, nurturing side come out socially. You can even allow yourself to be vulnerable and let guys take charge. I don’t believe that career confidence is related to finding the right man. I don’t think guys care so much about our careers. But I believe that radiating confidence in general about who you are will help to attract guys. Guys love physical beauty and a woman with self-confidence.

True, confidence is a universal aphrodisiac. Meanwhile, I’m in awe of someone who can pursue a full-time career–as a doctor, no less!–and write a book. What prompted you to write it?

Even though I’m a physician, above all I’m a woman whose priority is to have a family. After undergoing my own psychoanalysis, I felt much more in tune with myself and developed other interests outside of just finding the one. Shifting my focus toward myself and becoming a more spiritual and genuine person actually drew more sincere guys toward me.

That leads me to my next question. How has your love life been impacted since you wrote the book? And how do you meet men?

I’m single and dating. Personally, I much prefer to meet men through natural circumstances, whether in a yoga class, a social gathering, or through friends, as opposed to online, although I do know several friends who met their husbands online. I stopped going on endless blind dates because it felt so unnatural. I’ve taken a step back and allowed life to take its course without trying to over-control any situation. I try to give men space to be drawn to me and not feel like I’m seeking them.

How’s that working out for you?

In general, the men I’m attracting are more real and caring [than before]. It’s always easier to give advice than take it, but I’m trying very hard to follow my own advice!

You mentioned that some of the ideas in the book were drawn from kabalistic teachings. Can you tell me about your study of Kabbalah and how it informs some of the ideas in the book?

[Kabbalah] teaches the principles of reducing one’s ego to allow space for your other half, and also that of restriction when faced with a situation of instant gratification.

Some people believe that finding the right one is a numbers game, and requires a a pro-active approach. Others believe a number of people can be “The One” and finding him is more dependent on ourselves than any external factor. I”m wondering where you come down on this and why?

For sure if you sit at home all day and hardly meet anyone, the likelihood of meeting your match will be slim. On the other hand, it’s not because you’re going to every singles and networking event that you will find The One. You need to be in the right place physically and within you to be open to seeing the one. I believe that we all have several soul mates. It’s a question of being ready at the same time. Once you’ve done the correct work on yourself, [I believe] God will bring him to you.

Any chance we big city career women are overanalyzing all of this, and if so, why should women buy your book?

I do believe that most women overanalyze but it’s surely related to our very developed pre-frontal cortex. It’s in our nature so I’m not trying to change that. I just attempt to share some advice that I have used and that has helped me to develop much deeper meaningful relationships.

“Are You Ready for The One: A Career Woman’s Guide to Finding Your Man” is Available at createspace.com

Facebook page for “Are You Ready for the One?” facebook.com

The official book launch party will take place Thursday May 23 at EVR Lounge, 54 W. 39th Street between Fifth and Sixth Avenues, from 7 to 9pm. It will include champagne, mingling, and a fashion show, and is open to the public.

This entry was written by Heather Robinson and posted on April 22, 2013 at 6:32 pm and filed under Features. permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post. Keywords: . Post a comment or leave a trackback: Trackback URL. */?>